Losing faith

I think he's worried he will never be fed again.

Normal noises

This is a triumph of good, universal communication.

The Lazy Fox

Fulham, how do I love thee?

Democratic Republic of Mineral Water

Cut price biscuits

This garage has it all!

Wardrobe clearout..

Yields amazing treasure. I'm 33 years old.

Barons Court at sunset

Optimism

It didn't even move. Turns out you can't tow a whole bus with a Transit. Although if he'd succeeded the video would've been worth millions to Ford's marketing department.

Woodsmen

Pam is kind of a big deal

Black Up

But this is a jokily racist 1970's advertising agency, Webb!

Mmm, yummy colour flavour!

It's still just me, right?

A Mini and a half

Back at 7:00am

Lucky you.

Just So festival cocktail list

The lack of commitment is majestic.

Too much Pinky Ponk juice

Is this the one where the Tomblyboos miss the last Ninky Nonk and beat Iggle Piggle for letting the dinner go cold?

All the necessaries for a hot date

Ah yes, the childish joy...

...of losing your lunch money on the craps table.

Douglas Adams' favourite pub

You're not in the World sir, you are in Newcastle.

Is it just me?

It's still just me isn't it.

Pedal powered Scalextric

may be the best thing ever!

SALE

of note

Pure poetry

Hurrah for anyone seeing The World's End today. It's a modern classic.

It's a little warm in the office of late

A fortnight ago it was unseasonably cold for God's sake.

Street furniture

"Oh that's cheap"

says the Camden bartender. Apparently £20 isn't unusual in nightclubs. For 16s. Welcome to 2013, where only millionaires smoke legit snouts.

Hannibal's other job

Not the most reassuring sight when you're stuck in stop start traffic on the M4

Just a pavement snoozer

Snoozing all the time

Panini

is already plural.

Almost romantic

FECK

Lilac

Apparently one of my colours.

It's the fifth golden ticket, Mother, and I've found it!

Design life

I want to send this photo back in time 23 years to the guys at Lotus and give them all a heart attack. The trip counter was a happy accident, by the way. It's the kind of stupid thing I'd do but on this occasion I can take no credit.

Bike lane

My bothered face

Marketing.

It works.

Way to ruin all my fun, Sainsburys

Well it'd better be a scorching Summer

That's all I'm saying.

Grumpy reviewer

Carl's Route

Sounds about right. I do spend about half my life sitting on tubes through here.

Free with every bike

Ironically, spotted in a central London bike shop.

It even has a coin slot

A poster

Okay. So bear with me on this one. We're on a lads' weekend in the countryside. The traditional copy of Zoo magazine has been purchased. Inside was a free poster which on one side featured veteran boobslinger and ex Powwownow spokesperson Jodie Marsh and on the other this frankly mystifying partial mammary. It's beyond parody. A poster of half a tit. According to the mag, there are four to collect but even the complete set depicts neither face nor, well, anything that isn't directly associated with the nourishment of newborns. Zoo, we salute your single minded and shameless pursuit of the appreciation of large breasts. And nothing else.

Dessert swans a-swimming

Eva has provided a lovely Mothers' Day treat which is being served on Max's patent two-tone Angel Delight mini lakes.

The Royal Society for the Protection of Various Fauna

Parking in London

I do get annoyed when I get parking tickets on a technicality but then I see what my local council have had to do and I realise asinine rules come from somewhere.

Cash only

Old man's perogative

Two short but HOLY CRAP is it cold